It’s black outside. Inky black. Seems it’s blacker this year than ever before. Used to be I loved the cover of dark in these early hours. I used to love the hug of Time taking its time to spend moments with me. I used to love the feeling of there being no one but me... Continue Reading →

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If only…

And there they were, ~ a gathering of clouds ~ spread perfectly above a slice of sky ... a window to the universe.   Precisely aligned to reflect the beauty of the rising sun, these puffs of vapor were destined for greatness, designed for magnificence and clearly meant to become an unparalleled sunrise. Then... BOOM! Nothing.   Not... Continue Reading →

The Dance

My father-in-law died from Alzheimers this week. He died peacefully in the hands of a facility full of life and hope and angels dressed in flesh. Unmistakably, Alzheimer's is a hideous and heart-wrenching disease and to those of you living out this life with your loved ones, my heart goes out to you. Yet, I am... Continue Reading →

in the settling of the dust

the dust has settled now particles of Life strewn through space finding rest on window sills and piano benches and picture frames that speak of a different time when the dust was first kicked up into Clouds of Life that followed little boys dressed in ninja gear and cowboy hats and dreams too big to... Continue Reading →

the deep ache of Want

She was gone. And he was walking alone. Her camera in his hand, taking pictures of what life was meant to look like if she were near his side. Two weeks gone now, and he was wandering the canyons of Utah. Alone.   You wouldn't know on the outside. He smiled and chatted briefly about... Continue Reading →

… though I can’t imagine where

  Early morning shadows sprinkle the lawn revealing splashes of Light and baby fresh, spring-popping green. The robin hops through the landscape - stopping to listen - head cocked at the slightest rumble of a worm inching its way near. The flower turns its head to welcome morning's light. And just beyond, a doe and her... Continue Reading →

Old Crusty, be gone!

We all self-talk. We all have those inner conversations - some analytical, some matter-of-fact that say: "Do this. Go here. ... Okay, that's done." And then there's the other conversations - the judgments. The ones that wiggle their way into our hearts and hiss: "That was stupid! Why did you say THAT? I can't believe... Continue Reading →

A familiar tune

    The new day peaks its head just above the night and a mourning dove begins his soulful tune, Waking the Sun, his melody glides the currents of the dawn     Coo, coo-dee - COO, coooo coo Coo, coo-dee - COO, coooo, coo   Why does he sing, this morning minstrel, ... what moves him so? Does he... Continue Reading →

An Empty Canvas

"Just write" they say, "Just put your pen to paper, your fingers to keypad " they urge.   "Your heart will end up in the ink of new discovery," they tell me...   I suppose it's true. I suppose words are created in action that becomes thought and I suppose maybe even the opposite is true:... Continue Reading →

This Road We Walk

At what point do you stop believing what you see  and reach for the golden ring that passes by each waking turn? At what point do you grasp at the straws that lie scattered at your feet and build with them a mansion spun in gold? At what point do you take the stars and... Continue Reading →

Against all Odds

I didn’t know what I was getting into.  How many times, and for how many things could we say that? I wonder how many things we’d never have done had we known. I wonder if not knowing is the point. The point from which we throw caution to the wind and go diving in, only... Continue Reading →

when the stillness is the dancing

I hear the gentle breeze sneaking through my window, and the morning dove's call - just beyond the fence - blends with a neighborhood dog's cry for attention. The sprinklers beat out their rhythm as the chimes are teased into a simple melody - set sail to drift on passing clouds tipping their hats on... Continue Reading →

Rosy Pink or Lavender Sad

in the glow of an approaching sun, I hear it wrapped all rosy pink and lavender sad the morning anthem the whispering plea ...you ...today choose whom you will believe don't wait for the sun to burst into the fray of busy have-to day ...choose ...now this life, this day, this moment, waits for no... Continue Reading →

A Dream Come True

  I look out from my morning fortress, snuggled in my blanket, cradling coffee and sipping life.  I wish for deep thoughts, but they allude me here. Sometimes it’s everything just to watch and listen. As I wait, Sun's first rays shine bright their spotlight on dreams come true right at my feet and though... Continue Reading →

Unaware

The sunrise exploded the sky into a palette of brilliance this morning. One second, I notice a tiny beginning of color and I looked away... the next, the sky was on fire. Blazing, breath-taking, fire-breathing. I raced out the door, my robe ties dragging on the ground behind me, and my girl dog leaping up... Continue Reading →

Nighttime Visitor

It's late at night that she visits  - the dreamer the one whose voice I know, tugging gently my heart, she whispers -- "Wake up! Come away with me. Come, you're still young. Come, let's play like before. Let's go, let's eat the fruit, let's run!" I can hear her trying to disguise the desperateness... Continue Reading →

Time’s Echo

I remember her hands, wrinkled and plain her sliver-thin misshapen ring hanging loosely like her neck – Sagging misfits on her shrinking frame I remember his Jim Beam paunch, jutting past his cinched up belt A slide rule in his pocket and smoldering cigarette in his hand Strands of hair arching across his balding forehead... Continue Reading →

Autumns’ Dance

The leaves burn red and blaze orange around me and for a moment I’m caught unaware - breathless. In the middle of all this beautiful change I feel every part of me smile and weep and yearn all at the same time. What is it about Fall that causes my thoughts to tug at the... Continue Reading →

Through the Door

Last Saturday, we placed our Dad in what will be his last home. It was all things hard, all things right, and all things Life mixed into a jumble of wearied emotions and 'next thing' challenges. SO thankful to a God who loves us and ushers us gently through new thresholds - especially when their... Continue Reading →

Calling All Ye Jolly Oxen!

Sometimes out of nowhere Life bubbles up so full and overflowing that it spills over into one deliciously messy puddle of delightful mud. An amazing mix of Deep and True and all of earth’s richness swirled together into a perfect pool where words splash brown - washed clean - unleashed in hard earned Joy that... Continue Reading →

It’s icy blue outside - that shade of blue that paints itself cold between night and a dawning day. And in the distance the roosters have begun their morning song. Heralds of a new day, they crow in frantic urgency, “It’s coming! It’s coming! Wake up! Be ready!” Every morning they cry. A wandering frog... Continue Reading →

Nothing…and Yet Everything

It’s been a quiet season of the soul ... one of those seasons in which the light dawns and you realize you have nothing, and yet everything, to say. I look out from my morning chair, draped in woolen blanket, coffee in hand. It’s 5:30 in the morning and the sun is just beginning his... Continue Reading →

Look up

I get car sick and seasick and any other churning illusion that paints itself Deathly Dizzy White. I know its optical trickery. I know Outside stands still beyond the car window... as I'm catapulted forward motionless.  I know the horizon stretches beyond me steady and true ... as I bob and weave among Life's waves.... Continue Reading →

Each Day

  A prayer in the wake of a tornado The sun is going to rise today. Over the horizon. Covered by clouds or not, escorted by colors or not... the sun will rise. A relentless task master, a faithful friend. And ready or not, friend or foe, we move on together this sun and us.... Continue Reading →

Today I Dig Deep

This day I rush home. This day I tear off the Sunday best that paints me cold and distant with all things fake, and shallow. All things that I loathe.... and all things that I am. Something is going on in my soul, like a brewing storm. Something dark. deep. unknown. And I fall to... Continue Reading →

On your mark, Get set…

         In the beginning... I learned pretty early in my time here on Earth, that I don't like beginnings and endings. Beginnings brought the ever-looming reality of endings that inevitably caused pain. Whether those beginnings were for projects, or stories to be written, or new recipes, I decided I would avoid them as much as... Continue Reading →

Everyday Promises

  Last year, something remarkable occurred: I actually kept my New Year's resolution. Seriously. ... the whole year! I don't think I've ever achieved such a feat intentionally. Sure, I've renewed good intentions and yes, I've restarted some wavering beginnings... but an honest to goodness New Year's commitment? Nope. This was a first. It started... Continue Reading →

The Perfect Gift

I'm a recovering perfectionist. Ever since I can remember, I've been dancing this particular step called Not Good Enough: Not tall enough, not cute enough, not social enough, not 'Whatever' enough. And I spent a lot of years blaming it on my dad and his perfectionist ways. In my early adolescent memories, I have these... Continue Reading →

In Tragedy’s Wake

So lost at sea we search for land some direction to set our sights on a sign that says we'll be okay --adrift, tossed, and turned around-- we no longer know from where we've come, or which way to now go And above, so far above the sun shines its direction east, west, here, there... Continue Reading →

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