Echoing still

I’m not sure when I picked it up

Like a baby, it just seemed to need holding

coddling

It seemed so light at the time,

so helpless

surely I could be for it a safe place,

a “knighted” mom

a rescuer

a hero to the helpless

and carry it to the other side … (for its sake, of course.)

 

So I picked it up

and brought it with me,

I held it gingerly in my arms,

and when my arms wearied, just a bit,

I settled it into it own special place in my pack.

and we walked on.

I checked on it

– often –

I took it out often as well to let it know I was still there

watching over it

I cushioned it gently over the rough spots,

cradled through the valleys

and hefted it up over the imposing obstacles.

I never put it down

 

Ever.

 

Not that I wasn’t tempted

for it seemed it got heavier by the minute

But

It was my duty now, right?

and its whimpering cries only played louder in my head,

“I need you. “

“You’ve got to save me.”

“You’re responsible now.”

“You can’t stop now. How would that even be a consideration?”

“This is all your fault anyway, ya know. I’ve always been yours to deal.“

And somehow, like a child growing within me,

it had become part of me,

a ‘he-s not-heavy- he’s my-brother kind of thing.’… because somehow it needed me, or maybe now I needed it

 

… Only, the problem was,  “he” wasn’t my brother, or my child,

and “he” wasn’t even a he…

 

it was a worry, a thought, a ‘concern’, a self-imposed obligation,

a distraction, a pet argument, an ‘owie’, a reputation

a matter of pride, a hidden secret, a hurtful memory,

a disappointment

an unsaid word, a whiny complaint,

a wound

an injustice

a unanswered prayer

 

Plain and simple, I had picked up a burden

~ never meant to be my own~

and for the life of me I couldn’t even remember where or when I had picked it up in the first place. It had seemed so innocent then, so right, so natural

 

Did I have to go back to  “then and there”

Was this burden to be my “here and now”… forever?

And would I even know what to do without it?

 

Caught in an echo of old, my heart cried out

“Oh, who can save me from myself and this body of death…”

 

And then came the reply, echoing too, loud and clear:

“Sweetheart, there really is – and will always be – only one answer… and your heart knows it – as surely as you are known:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Lay it down, punkin’

… Lay it down.”

Echoing still…

may I hear this forever.

… And gently in his whisper

like a child, in His arms

I am held.

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Linking up with Five Minute Friday

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